Similar Previous Story

Good morning!

Bike lanes, tickets, however drivers, blah blah blah…

Look, what would you like from me? It’s getting actually onerous to care about any of this anymore. Actually I assure we’ll be seeing precisely the identical story in 100 years, besides we’ll be watching it on ocular implants as a substitute of TVs, laptops, and smartphones, and the quotes can be extra like this:

“Increase your hand should you’ve nearly been mowed down by one among these flying cyber area bikes”

“X36920, Transportation Options’ humanoid AI presence, assumed the reassuring form of an anthropomorphic koala to elucidate that the actual downside is atomic-powered macro-SUVs, and what’s wanted are extra maglev bike lanes and never felony summonses.”

And so forth.

By the way in which, I put “X36920, Transportation Options’ humanoid AI presence, assuming the reassuring form of an anthropomorphic koala to elucidate that the actual downside is atomic-powered macro-SUVs, and that what’s wanted are extra maglev bike lanes and never felony summonses,” and right here’s what I acquired:

That’s truly fairly good, and it reassures me that I can even belief the AI with my medical diagnoses, retirement account administration, and trip planning.

Talking of The Bike Lane Story That By no means Ends, right here’s a narrative all the way in which from our 51st state:

I do suppose it’s value nothing that the futuristic shifting image that accompanies the headline reveals two folks utilizing the bike lane (not together with whoever’s doing the filming). One in all them is driving some type of motor scooter, and the opposite is driving a bicycle and towing a trailer. Each the scooterist and the individual doing the filming cross a turning automobile on the best:

I’m unsure why the designers of motorbike lanes are so decided to place folks into this sort of scenario. However, you already know, there’s a signal telling folks to yield, so nothing dangerous can occur:

Definitely that is probably the most thrilling city driving footage to come back out of the Nice White North since “Homicide of Couriers,” the “Citizen Kane” of Canadian bike messenger movie:

That movie after all gave us one of many biggest quotes ever uttered within the historical past of cinema:

Typically you simply filter and also you’re similar to, “Whoah,” you already know, “I nearly acquired hit by 4 completely different buses and I punched a jaywalker and nearly shit my pants.”

Rosebud schmosebud.

As for the article itself, the visitors scenario in Toronto is really horrific, and this tragic instance actually hit dwelling:

Toronto’s continual visitors snarls can come as an unwelcome shock to some guests. In February, the Carolina Hurricanes hockey workforce needed to abandon a trip due to visitors and stroll the remaining blocks to a downtown enviornment — not the primary time skilled athletes have had to do this.

Skilled athletes needed to stroll?!? Oh the humanity! Perhaps subsequent time they need to take off their skates first.

And at last, talking of the identical previous story time and again, it’s…one other gravel bike:

However this one’s designed for actual gravel, not that faux stuff:

‘We wished to create a product meant for quick gravel use on actual gravel, like white roads, not singletrack,’ says Aghito. ‘I might advocate the King Zydeco 2 to a rider who likes to compete, greater than the rider who’s an adventurer.’ 

It’s additionally aero, as a result of Cinelli says it’s:

Cinelli claims the tube shapes of the King Zydeco 2 are competitively aerodynamic, though they haven’t been developed in a wind-tunnel. The down tube and seat tube are suitably bladed, and Cinelli has specced a proprietary Allroad D-shaped seatpost, that means it’s the one one suitable with the body. Different nods to aerodynamics embrace a one-piece aero cockpit with totally inside cabling.  

In engineering jargon, an “Italian wind tunnel” is only a man smoking a cigarette while staring critically on the bike:

[“Dat’s a-notta aero, you gotta make it more pointier!”]

Along with being aero, the brand new Cinelli gravel bike seems like a highway bike:

Being a standard Italian model, Cinelli’s body geometry tends to be on the racy facet, and the King Zydeco 2 isn’t any completely different. Aghito says, ‘The sensation you have got is like driving a highway bike. You might be able the place you may push, you may switch a whole lot of energy on the rear wheel.’ 

So mainly it’s a highway bike.

Glad we straightened that out.