I strive to not click on on sensational headlines, I actually, actually don’t. However I strive to not do a variety of different issues, too, comparable to cross-chaining, consuming within the morning, and cursing on the cat. As common, the solar’s barely up and I’ve already failed in any respect of these issues (excluding the cross-chaining, although I can guarantee you I’ll have performed that by lunch), so what the hell, I’m going to make you click on on this headline too:
Right here’s what occurred, and I’m unsure how I missed this again in 2023, although presumably it was a uncommon case of my managing to not click on on a lurid headline:
An Olympic bicycle owner whose spouse died after he hit her with a automotive throughout a combat has been criticised for a social media put up describing a Porsche as a “weapon”.
Final yr, Rohan Dennis acquired a 17-month suspended sentence over a 2023 automotive incident which killed Melissa Hoskins – additionally an Olympic bicycle owner – outdoors the couple’s Adelaide dwelling.
A courtroom discovered Dennis was not criminally chargeable for his spouse’s demise, however had disregarded her security after he continued to drive whereas she clung onto the automobile.
Perhaps I wasn’t consuming that morning.*
*[Relax, I don’t really drink in the morning…except for certain holidays and very special occasions. And at airports, obviously. You’re allowed to drink at any time of day or night in an airport.]
Anyway, this occurred awhile in the past, and it appears like he acquired a suspended sentence in 2025, however apparently he’s within the information once more due to a social media put up during which he refers to a Porsche as a “weapon:”
Her feedback referred to 2 pictures that Dennis – who continues to be banned from driving – posted on his Instagram account of a newly-washed black Porsche with the caption: “What an absolute weapon”.
I figured this was simply a picture of individuals digging up harmless posts from earlier than the incident, however then I checked and…holy crap, he made the put up two days in the past?!?
Nevertheless it’s okay, as a result of it’s not the Porsche, it’s only a Porsche:
It’s understood the Porsche just isn’t the identical automotive that killed his spouse.
Whew!
Additionally, he wasn’t driving a Porsche on the time. I seemed it up, and apparently it was a Volkswagen Amarok, which I additionally needed to lookup, as a result of we don’t have that automotive right here in West Greenland:
Wait. It’s a pickup, and you may’t purchase it right here? This story simply will get weirder and weirder.
Look, as I say, I actually strive to not get sucked into the sordid affairs of others, or revel of their misfortune. (Until it’s somebody dropping their derailleur’s battery midway by way of a 100-mile journey and having to finish it with out shifting, I’ll completely experience that.) Additionally, possibly persons are misinterpreting the Porsche put up–like, possibly he hates automobiles now, and so he was calling it a “weapon” disgustedly, like they do on Streetsblog. However nonetheless, I simply needed to know…how does one thing like this even occur, anyway?
In the course of the case, the courtroom heard that the pair had been arguing about kitchen renovations earlier than Dennis acquired into his automotive to go away.
Hoskins jumped onto the bonnet and later held onto the automotive door as Dennis continued to drive, earlier than falling off and getting struck by the automotive. She was taken to hospital and later died of her accidents.
At sentencing, Choose Ian Press stated he accepted Dennis tried to “de-escalate the argument” by driving off however it didn’t excuse his actions to maintain driving whereas his spouse was on the automotive.
The decide accepted Dennis was remorseful and had a “sense of accountability for all that occurred”.
What sort of high-stakes kitchen-related argument ends in the demise of a partner? Perhaps it was over whether or not they need to go together with the Waterstone Modern Gantry Faucet With Articulated Spout (worth: $6,267.75):
Or the Waterstone Conventional Wheel Pull-Down Faucet (worth: $5,904.75):
Every is arguably the Gravel Bike of Taps, in that there’s approach an excessive amount of happening for what’s actually a reasonably simple enterprise you may accomplish with one thing a lot, a lot easier.
Look, I already really feel ashamed of myself for having written as a lot about this as I’ve, however at the very least possibly we are able to study one thing right here, and if nothing else this story is a crucial reminder that if you need to go away in a huff it is best to use a motorbike as an alternative of a automotive, and in addition that it is best to all the time go away any and all dwelling renovation selections to your spouse. (It’s not sexist if it’s true.) Oh, and STAY OFF SOCIAL MEDIA, particularly should you’ve been concerned in another person’s demise.
Transferring on, yesterday I discussed the Platypus:
And within the step-thru spirit I’m happy to current this month’s winner of the JBARA Award:
Additionally, I don’t know who the vendor of this subsequent bike is, and I sometimes don’t promote nameless classifieds, particularly since final time I acquired a reader concerned in a web-based sale they acquired scammed. Nonetheless, *assuming it’s professional*, would somebody please, please purchase this and take it off the market so I don’t drive as much as New Paltz and purchase it for myself?
Caveat emptor, do your due diligence, disclaimer disclaimer, and all that stuff. But when now you can choose up a motorbike like this for beneath $400 as a result of the world has moved on to crabon, dick breaks, and electrical shifting, then I say carry ’em on.
