Keep In Your Lane

Additional to yesterday’s submit, don’t do this at house:

Not as a result of it’s harmful, however as a result of it’s so downright tame the boredom might put you to sleep and and also you would possibly fall off your bike. I solely hope the irate mountain bikers from the opposite day don’t come up with that, as a result of I’ll by no means stay it down. More than likely they’d give me crap for using like a “woosie” and for not carrying a helmet, which is ironic, as a result of while you trip like a woosie you don’t really want a helmet. (Mid-ride naps however, in fact.)

Hey, I’m no watermelon fucker:

Nor am I a freeway scooterist:

I want I’d been in a position to take a greater picture however, you recognize, I used to be driving and I shouldn’t have been utilizing the cellphone in any respect. Nonetheless, it’s too dangerous the “Welcome to the Bronx” signal isn’t clearer, since that is just about probably the most Bronx factor possible. I can’t inform if he’s white-knuckling it and considering to himself, “Oh shit, I’m on the freeway!,” or if he’s simply calmly cruising and savoring the lengthy line of site visitors behind him. Recently I’ve additionally been seeing supply folks on e-bikes and comparable conveyances on this stretch of highway so I’m wondering in the event that they’re merely being led astray by GPS.

Sarcastically there’s a serene and picturesque bike path instantly adjoining to this freeway that may take you from the Bronx just about all the best way to Canada, however to be honest you’re more and more prone to encounter mysterious pants:

So possibly he figured it was definitely worth the threat.

Talking of e-bikes, a rider of 1 has run into a little bit woman in Brooklyn:

E-bikes? Supply folks? Bike lanes? Injured kids? Jews??? That is the stuff of New York Metropolis tabloid writers’ moist desires!

I admit I too was grateful for yet one more excuse to malign e-bikes and excoriate their riders, although having watched the precise video I have to say I’m not all that impressed:

Is the e-bike too quick for the bike lane? Positive. Ought to the rider have been extra ready to cease? Actually. Is the so-called “parking-protected” bike lane configuration New York favors arguably as idiotic as it’s Frogger-esque? Completely. Have I requested sufficient rhetorical questions? Not but. May you could have designed a motorcycle lane to extra successfully insure that riders will be unable to see babies till it’s too late? Most likely not:

On the identical time, fortunately the kid appears solely to have sustained minor accidents, and extremely the rider remained on the scene. And to not “However drivers!” the scenario, nevertheless it’s not even in the identical universe as this horrific story:

Actually, it’s simply unthinkably terrible:

“I don’t wish to put my breath on one thing that’s going to comprise my DNA,” she allegedly instructed a detective shortly after 3:30 p.m. that day. “No, I’m good. Need to odor my breath? There’s no alcohol on my breath. You wish to take a breathalyzer? Positive, go for it. I’m simply saying I don’t like my DNA on issues.”

The crash killed mother Natasha Saada and her two daughters — Diana, 8, and Debra, 5 — whereas leaving her 4-year-old son, Philip, critically injured.

Which is why it’s now an “explosive marketing campaign subject:”

No, wait, that’s the bike lane factor:

Lastly, in far much less miserable information, a 92-year outdated rider will tackle UNBOUND, the world’s premier gravel occasion, introduced by @shimanogravel, an entirely owned subsidiary of Life Time Athletic Occasions, all rights reserved, and so on. and so forth:

He attributes his fortitude to his years spent as a land surveyor in Texas:

Schmid’s toughness wasn’t born on a motorcycle. He spent 5 a long time as a land surveyor within the Texas warmth, swinging a bush axe by poison ivy and mosquitoes. The work was brutal, however quitting wasn’t an possibility. “You simply saved going,” he says. “Everybody else was on the market doing the identical.” That work ethic nonetheless drives him in the present day.

Let’s hope he doesn’t run up towards any constructing contractors:

Anyway, I hope you’ll all be a part of me in wishing the perfect of luck to Fred, who is maybe probably the most excessive instance I’ve ever seen of somebody who not solely REFUSES to Simply Purchase A Rivendell Already, but in addition seems like he would possibly shoot you for merely suggesting it.

Honest sufficient.